Make me immortal
by Links1467
Summary: Strange dreams and pretty girls.
1. Chapter 1

"How long this time?" I ask, tickling her neck with my nose. "Long enough." She strokes my hair lovingly, and I pout. It's never long enough. "I want to stay." She chuckles. "I know you do, but you can't." She says simply. "Why not?" I ask, pulling back to meet her eyes. "Because you have to wake up."

My eyes shoot open, and for a moment, I think I've died. Then my eyes adjust to the darkness of my room. I rub the palms of my hands into them and groan. You think by now I'd be used to them. To her.

But I'm not. It almost _hurts._ To feel her warmth, her weight float away from me so fast. Sometimes I wake up with my arms wrapped around myself, like she had just been there. I don't know who she is, but she must be important, I've decided. They say you only dream faces you've seen before, but I'd remember that face.

I lay back down and wring my hands over my stomach as I go through all I can remember of her. She's beautiful, almost indescribable, but I'll try. She has long, thick hair the color of ravens. I sigh happily as I remember running my fingers through it once. Her eyes are this intense green, I can only compare to moss after a hard rain.

Her kiss...its heaven. I let out a frustrated breath. It's just as intangible. I close my eyes for a few moments, willing my mind to stay blank so I can fall asleep...

No such luck.

...

"Tori, you haven't touched your breakfast. Is something wrong?" My mother asks. "Yeah, you look terrible." Trina adds, pointing a fork in my direction. I sigh and continue prodding my eggs. "I'm fine. I just had another...nightmare."

"Oh, poor thing." My mother coos. "Are you sure you don't want to talk to someone about them?" I squint hard at my plate. "Maybe... Maybe I should." She claps. "Oh! Wonderful! So what are they?" She asks excitedly. I roll my eyes. "Not with you, mom." She looks disappointed, but continues. "So who then? A therapist? A _stranger?_ "

"No, mom." I say tiredly. "Then who?" I try to think. "What about Lane?" Trina suggests. My face scrunches up. "Our guidance counselor?" She nods and continues eating. "I guess that could work." Hes not exactly a stranger, and he's not someone I care enough to be embarrassed in front of...

...

"Uh huh, and how long have you been having these dreams?" "Since I was... 14 I guess." "Ah ha." He says. "Puberty." I cringe. "Tell me, do you have a boyfriend?" I shake my head. "Girlfriend? Partner?" I keep shaking my head. "Have you ever?" I've been on a few dates, but it always felt wrong, like I was supposed to be somewhere else. "No."

He scribbles something down. "Maybe..." He starts carefully. "Maybe you're lonely. Try going out on a few dates. Who knows. Maybe next time we speak you'll be dreaming of someone else." The words make my stomach flip.

But my brain knows hes right. It's time to stop dreaming...

"In all my years as an educator I have never, _never_ met a student so intolerable!" We both face the yelling behind his door. It flies open and in walks Mrs. Hayes holding a girl by the back of her shirt. Her face is obscured by a large, bloody rag. Is she okay?

Lane voices my worries. "Yes yes, she's fine. She's already been to the nurses, nothings broken." She tosses the girl in the room. "Her attitude is what needs fixing." "What happened?" He asks. "She got in a fight! With Ryder Daniels, my prize pupil!" She shouts, then narrows her eyes at the girl. "How is he supposed to perform with his face looking like _that_?" The girl just shrugs her shoulders and I hear a muffled chuckle.

The woman gasps and storms off. "Please sit down." Lane says to her, motioning to the spot next to me. She takes it. "This is Tori, another student here." She faces me an extends the hand not nursing her face. "Jade." She says gruffly. I shake her hand, and her eyes peek over the cloth. My breath catches. I'd known those eyes anywhere, I look into them every night. She seems just as lost, and she lets me brush her hair away from her forehead, revealing more of her to me.

"Jade..." Lane thinks aloud. "Jade West?" I yank my hand back and she blinks rapidly before facing him. "Um, yeah. That's me." It's her. Her voice, her eyes, her hair. "You just transferred here, correct?" Her eyes stray to me for a moment and she nods. Lane lets out a heavy sigh. "Well welcome to Hollywood Arts."


	2. Chapter 2

"Do you want to tell me what the fight was about?" I tilt my head back. "Not really." His eyes drop to the floor and he clasps his hands together. "Well, what do you think of Hollywood Arts?" I don't answer. He sighs. "Is there anything you do wanna talk about?" He says, defeated. My eyes drift to the spot next to me.

"Who was that girl in here before?" He seems surprised, and answers "That was Tori Vega. She's a rising star here." I bet. I couldn't take my eyes off her. "She seems...interesting." I say cryptically. Lane stares at me, then says "It's your first day here and you get a bloody nose, and you think she's interesting?" I shrug.

"Tell me about her." A smile creeps up his face. I don't like it. "How about you tell me about yourself first." I raise an eyebrow. "Is this blackmail?" He smiles even wider. "Think of it as... a trade. You give me info, I give you info." I scowl at him, but he smiles on unfazed. I groan.

"Fine. He said something... _unflattering_ about me and I decided to teach him a lesson." Lane nods knowingly. "Hes got quite a mouth on him, but that's no excuse for violence." He says sternly. I roll my eyes, typical authority. Everything's black and white. I remove the cloth and check to see if my nose is still bleeding. He got me good, ill admit that. I smirk to myself. I got him worse.

"Why don't you go wash up, and well continue tomorrow." I shake my head. "Why don't you tell me about her, then I'll come back." He smiles. "Because you won't.

...

"Do feel it? The raw power that courses through you? You should by now. It's not much longer..." The thick, murky water speaks to me. "Soon this... _all_ of this...will be over. Soon...the dream will end. You will wake up.

I bolt awake, hyperventilating. I'm trying to catch my breath but a breeze blows through my window and I shiver, alerting me that I'm drenched in sweat. I groan and make my way to my shower.

The warm water comforts me, flows over my hair and covers my ears. It the makes the patter sound muffled, close. Like its coming from inside. I sigh and turn the water off. Stepping out, I wrap myself in a towel and finally check the time. 3 a.m. Great. I have school at 6. I run my fingers through my damp hair. No point in trying to fall back asleep, it wont work. I collapse on my bed and flip on the Tv. Family Guys on. Well at least I wont have to think. An image of the dark water flashes in front of my eyes, and I shutter.

...

"So how do you like it here?" I shake my head. "Nuh uh. You first." He gives me a sly smile and starts to speak. "What do you wanna know?" I cast my eyes on the floor and tap my foot rapidly. I don't know, I just...wanna know her. "What's she like?" I answer, not taking my eyes off his purple carpet. "She's nice." I give him a look. "Really! She's nice. Always helping others and what not."

"If she's so great, what was she doing in here?" He sighs. "She's having a...tough time. I shouldn't talk about it." I nod, I can respect that. "But she's also talented, driven..." "Beautiful..." I add quietly. He smiles at me and I blush. "That too." He leans closer. "You know, I think both of you could use a friend. I could...set something up?" He says hopefully.

Having your guidance counselor set you up seems incredibly lame, but if its with her... I'm willing to take a shot to my pride. I nod. "Great! She's up next actually. Why don't you hang back and I'll mention it before my time with her is up." He says cheerily. "Now, I'd say that's a pretty big favor, so. How do you like Hollywood Arts?"

"Its paradise." I deadpan.


	3. Chapter 3

I can't sit still, I've been on edge since yesterday. She's _real!_ And she's here! I didn't even feel sad when I woke up from her this morning, just excited. It's taken all my sanity not to run down the halls screaming her name. When will I see her again? I glance at the clock. 5 minutes of this period left.

5 more minutes and I have to see Lane. Should I tell him? Will he even believe me? Figures, as soon as I agree to get help it turns out I'm _not_ crazy.

...

"I'm sorry Tori, the only thing I'm getting from these dreams is that your lacking in the romantic relationship part of your life." Lane says sadly. "Here, I got you this." He hands me a spiral note book. "Start writing your dreams down in this and we figure them out together." He smiles comfortingly. I glance at the clock.

His eyes follow mine. "Yes...its about that time. Before you go though, do you remember the girl who came in here before?" He questions. "Jade." I answer without hesitation, and he smiles. "Yes, Jade. Well she's new here and she's having a hard time...adjusting." He chooses his words carefully. "I thought it might be a good idea for you two to spend some time together."

My eyes widen, and my grin splits my face. "Yeah. I think-" my voice comes out weak, so I try again. "I think that's a great idea." I speak at an octave his ears can register. "Great!" He cheers. "She's in my waiting room, why don't the two of you get lunch together?" I blush, this is so weird. Who cares.

I nod. The bell rings and butterflies fill my stomach. She's right outside the door, _waiting_ for me. My hand shakes as I turn the knob and reveal her to me. Without the rag over her face, I can see the features I love so much, kind of.

Her arms are crossed. Her lips are twisted in a scowl. Her eyes are narrowed. But then, she sees me. Her pissed off expression gives way to pure blankness. We stare at each other for a moment until Lane comes up behind me. "Go have fun you too!" Her scowl returns, aimed at him, while I blush again.

Lane disappears back into his office and she stands. "Vega." She says, a little curtly, but I smile nonetheless. "West." She rolls her eyes and smiles too. "Ready to do this?" Born ready.

I nod, but continue to just stare at her. My head didn't do her justice, she's gorgeous. God her eyes are even more vivid in person, I cant wait to see them up close. She watches me too, probably reactionary. Her eyes fall to my lips for only a second, but my heart palpitates, and I'm broken. Her eyes shift to the left. "So...we should go, then?" She asks, seeming just as dazed. I shake my head, snapping back into consciousness. "Yeah, lets... go." I shake my head again.

...

We start walking, but when we reach the cafeteria doors I stop and she keeps going. "Um, Jade?" She does stop and turns to me, a lazy grin on her face. "Yes?" My eyes trace the curve of her lips and it takes me a moment to answer. "Uh... The cafs this way..." She steps closer to me. "Lane said go get lunch" she stresses the 'go'. "So lets go get lunch." She pulls her keys out of her pocket and twirls them around her finger once before stopping them in her palm and turning around.

...

"Where do you want to eat?" I ask nervously, watching the school fade away behind us. She shrugs and flashes that lazy smile again. Maybe lazy isn't the right word. It's this easy little half grin, like shes not even that happy, just in a good mood. Either way it makes me stop and admire her all the more. "I don't know, I'm new here remember? What's good?" I think for a moment. "There's a really good burger place not far from here." She stops at a red light and faces me. "I, _love_ burgers." I raise an eyebrow.

She shrugs and pulls out of the light a moment later. "What can I say, nothing better than a good burger." I laugh and rest my head back, just watch her drive. For so long I've wanted to touch her, kiss her. I didn't even think how wonderful it will be to get to know her. To love her properly.

...

Im still watching her and I almost miss it. "Its that one, right there." I point to a small building in a small plaza. She pulls into the parking lot and shuts her car off. She runs a hand over her cheek. "Something on my face, Vega?" She asks, grinning cheekily. I know I've been staring at her the whole ride, but I cant help it. I shake my head. "Nope." I reply simply, still not taking my eyes off her. Her smile fades and her eyes linger on mine. "You're..." She starts.

Next thing I know she's practically on top of me, her hands cupping my jaw gently. Her mouth is contrastingly insistent, and it takes me a moment to shove her off. She falls back into her seat, breathing heavy. She stares at me for a long time. She kissed me. She _kissed_ me! I can't help but smile, and it must ease something in her because she can speak again.

"Shit." She laughs. And I laugh too. "Shit, I'm sorry. I'm kind of... _extremely_ impulsive." She explains. Her eyes are guilty, but there's a wary smile on her face as she gauges my reaction. "Um..well..." I don't know what to say. My lips feel heavy, like I can still feel her on them. "Why?" I trail off, focusing on her again. She shrugs. "You're hot?" She guesses. I blush, but manage a chuckle through the flattery. "You don't know?" She shrugs again. "Like I said, it was an impulse thing, my mind didn't really get an input." After a moment she asks "Are we...okay?" sounding adorably hopeful. So okay. Don't say that.

"Yes." I say with false decision, nodding like no was an option. She slowly reaches over and takes my hand, entwining our fingers with experimental caution. Her eyes don't leave them. "I know it was kind of a dick move, but... It felt _right_ , right?" She meets my eyes, and I stare back at her in awe. Her green eyes wash over with doubt and her eyebrows gather. "I'm not crazy right?"

I squeeze her hand and give her a reassuring smile. "No." I say softly. "Cool." She responds, voice just as quiet. We spend a moment just staring at each other, resting our heads turned on our seats, her thumb slowly stoking the back of my hand. I could do this all day.

...

A/N Pov switches every chapter so if one seems short, its because I need the next portion to be told from different perspective.


	4. Chapter 4

"This is kinda weird." I tell her once we've sat down. Her eyes peek over her menu. "Having your guidance counsel set you up? What's weird about that?" I give a surprised laugh and look at my lap for a second. "Yeah that's weird too...but I mean this, you." Her eyebrows raise, but I'm in no rush to explain. I smooth my hands out over my jeans and meet her eyes. "I feel like I know you." Instead of surprised, she looks worried _._ "I don't right?" I say, dreading I forgot her for some small interaction my mile a minute brain couldn't hold onto. She bites her lip and puts her menu down, her eyes concentrating on it like its the hardest task in the world.

Oh shit, I must've forgotten her. God, why cant I remember _anything!_ She looks at me, and a shy smile blooms on her lips. "I'd remember you." Her words knock the breath out of me, just like in my car, and I have to fight the urge to leap across the table and kiss her again. "You..." I start, but laugh, deciding better on voicing my embarrassing affection for her.

She's so calm and yet, she makes my blood pump. I look at her and everything in my brain, no my _veins_ \- is telling me to touch her. Like if I just get my hands on her, I'll be alright. And I was. When I kissed her, it was like my universe centered, and I could breathe again. The pounding, the voice telling me to touch her, was placated, and I was calm. Just enjoying the feel of her lips on mine.

"Can we go back to the car?" I joke. She laughs dejectedly and pink dusts her insane cheeks. "What about your burger. You love burgers." She says, leaning closer and resting her chin in her hand. She's so goddamn cute. I wish I was a normal person with self control, cause if our waiter didn't show up at that second I'm sure I would've jumped her again.

"Welcome to good burger, home of the good burger. May I take your order?" Hes a lanky, acne ridden adult. I don't know whether to glare at him, or get on my knees and thank him for keeping me from ruining my chances with my dream girl.

But I still want him gone as soon as possible, so I order for the both of us. "Two cokes and two good burgers, _obviously._ " I spit, despite my thankfulness. Tori flinches at my tone. "And make mine extra rare." I add. "N-no problem..." He chokes out. "Anything else?" He looks like hes about to cry. Pathetic.

"Actually, I'll have the veggie burger." She says kindly. Mental gag. "Coming right up!" He cheers, holding her warm gaze. That's enough of that.

"So go get it." I snap loudly, knocking him out of his dreamy state. He pouts and shuffles off towards the kitchen. Vegas eyeing me warily, and I shrink. Another one of my amazing traits. What's mine is _mine._ Even if its for the next five seconds before she bolts for the door. I offer a sheepish smile "So why the veggie burger?"

Thankfully, her eyebrows return to their original place on her face. "I'm a vegetarian." She says proudly. Now my eyebrows shoot up, and I give her a suspicious look. "So why did you pick a burger restaurant?" She shrugs. "My dad loves this place, and its near our school. Plus, their veggie burgers aren't half bad."

Vegetarian... I guess we can get past that. I love meat. Digging my teeth through the skin, licking bones clean... Feeling the blood of a nice rare burger drip down my chin after a huge bite... It feels almost primal. It feels good. Nevertheless, my eyes linger on her smile, so happy its back. "We could go somewhere else, you don't have to have something that's 'not half bad'." Or fucking terrible. She shakes her head dismissively. "Nah, we come here all the time, I kind of love it. I'm just really underselling it." I chuckle.

All the time. "Do you know that guy?" I say, jerking my thumb in the direction the baby went. She nods "Yeah, that's Charlie. And he's probably wetting his pants right now. Are you always that rude to strangers?"

She's still smiling though, so I smile too. "No, just ones that stare like that." I grumble playfully. "Well, I was staring at you like that five minutes ago." She says pointedly. I smirk. "And I tackled you, I'd say that's pretty rude." She bites her lip innocently, but my mind goes to opposite scenarios. "I didn't mind."

My eyes widen, and she laughs and looks away. "Don't look at me like that, I like you okay?" She defends. Awesome.

...

Somehow I manage to control my temper _and_ my libido for the rest of lunch, but she didn't make it easy. I found out quickly that she has a habit of talking with vehemently with her hands. The third time she almost knocked her drink over I took them in mine and toyed with them for the rest of the meal. She's such a dork...why does it turn me on?

Now were back in the school parking lot, neither of us getting out of my car. It's so weird, were still going see each other during the rest of school, but it feels like I should walk her to her front door and kiss her goodnight. "Can I see your schedule?" She asks. I rummage through my glove box and pull out a spare I'd shoved in there for 'safe keeping'.

She smiles then looks it over. "Ah...just as I thought. We have no classes together." She finishes sadly. She hands it back to me and I pout as I put it away. When I face her she's staring at me again. I wave and settle back on my side, watching her too. She chuckles and apologizes, then mirrors my position. It's like when we left except- She holds her hand out to me, that sweet shy smile reappearing.

I give her mine and she tugs it lightly. I don't understand. She laughs softly and slowly pulls me closer by my hand. As soon as my lips touch hers I drop her hand in favor of curling mine around her waist and her tentative kiss makes my head swim. I need her closer. She exhales softly through her nose and rests her arms on my shoulders, and I'm in _heaven._

After a minute or so I pull back a fraction to breathe, and her sweet smelling breath surrounds me. I almost moan before I'm crushing our lips together again, pushing her further back against the door. I'm almost laying across the console but I don't care, she's still not close enough.

Someone knocks at the window and I actually _growl_ at having to separate. I put my hands on the armrest behind her to lift myself up and she puts arm on her seat to keep her upright, the other still loose around my neck. We watch a group of boys make an obscene gesture as they walk past to their cars. There's a lot more people in the parking lot then when we got here, and I'm too dazed to even flip them off.

Vega blushes and hides her face in my neck while I check the time on the center console. "Holy shit, how long have we been out here?" I ask. "I don't know." She mumbles. I smile down at her, she's mortified. "Dude, schools _over._ "

...

A/N Was that reference lame? Don't tell me if its lame. It's a nick show, they'd _want_ me to say it.


	5. Chapter 5

"What?" I ask incredulously, my head snapping up from the crook of her neck. Jade doesn't miss a beat. "Oh well." She sighs, leaning in again. "Wait." I rush out, and catch her face to stop her. My arm around her neck tightens instinctively, now that I've lost my support. Her eyebrows are hunched in strain and do her eyes look...darker? I brush her cheek with the pad of my thumb and watch the sternness of her expression ebb away.

I really want to take things slow, but I've been in love with this girl since I was _fourteen_. She ambles towards me again and kisses me softly for a moment, then pulls back and meets my gaze with hazy, yet excited eyes. "Yes?"

"Can we...slow down?" She nods and rests her forehead against mine for a moment, she appears to be gathering herself. She looks almost...in pain. I run my fingers through her hair. "Are you okay?" I ask. Another pause, then she nods slightly. "Yeah, I just... I'm not easy or anything," she laughs and I smile sympathetically "I just...you..." Her face scrunches up again, and I press my lips to her forehead. She sighs and bows her head on my chest.

"God, you even smell good." She mumbles. I laugh, and I'm glad she cant see me blushing for the thousandth time since she arrived.

...

She's tucked under my arm, bleeding heat into my side. I love holding her like this. I wonder if she feels safe. As safe as I feel when she holds me.

I feel her start to grind against me, a light squeeze on my thigh. She exhales a small moan into my hair, the warmth surrounds us. "I can feel you doing that." The squeezing stops and her cold nose traces my collarbone. "I'm sorry." She sighs wistfully. Summer always has her like this.

"Do you want me to touch you?" She pulls away and looks me in the eye, before nodding eagerly.

"Talk to me first." I request. She dips her head and laps at my neck, then drags her teeth to my collar bone. She starts up her ministrations again, and the combination of these things cause my eyes slam shut.

"Tan skin..." she pants, dropping kisses all over my skin. "Blue blood...fresh bruises..." She mumbles, kissing the rakes her teeth left. "Its red skin...coating blue veins...like rivers...that bruises..."

I roll us over, and her dress pools around her hips. I take two fingers and drag them up her thigh. I don't stop till they're constricted by soft, wet nerves. "It's p-practically s _creaming..._ its real... you're real... feel me..." She gasps. I love when she rambles on like this, barely making sense, hardly forming words.

I press my lips to her skin. "What else?" "Blue blood... so _cold_." She whines. I continue rubbing along her tight walls. "Tan skin, angry skin, warm skin..." she rants. I feel her clench around me but I know she's still a ways from letting go. "My body... My body!" She cries.

I'd laugh if it wasn't so hot, knowing I'm what reduces her usually eloquent speech to this mess. "my body...help it eat...hear it breathe when I don't... It loves-" her voice cracks "loves blue bruises...give it what it wants...my body... to protect...my body..." She trails off. Whereas before she was simply meeting the pace of my hands, her thrusts are getting more frantic now, and I know I wont get much more out of her. "I'm so close now... beating of my heart... it's in my hands now..."

I watch the tiny beads of sweat forming on her skin, and affectionately wipe her crown. Her eyes roll back into her head and when they return they're black as the pit. She bites her lip and begins breathing roughly through her nose. She rolls us over again and I soak up her writhing form, wrapping my arms around her neck, keeping her bucking body close as she finishes over me.

My eyes look past her twitching form and watch the swaying trees in the distance. The soft moans she pants in my ear mix the warm breeze swirling around us. She pounds against me twice, expels a quiet mewl, half heartedly presses against me once more, then sags. I take no offense, I know I'm not fast enough for her sometimes.

I place one hand on the back of her neck and run the other through her hair, waiting for her breathing to even out. "You're sweating." I tease. She laughs and mumbles something incoherent before nuzzling my neck. I press my lips to her sweat rimmed crown and close my eyes, marvelously content.

My eyes open slowly. That was...knew. Not the sex, we took the next ethereal step when I turned 16 and it became a part of my life. I was like...another person. It was more like living a memory than any of the other dreams. Usually they're just mix-matched situations, her telling me she loves me, us laughing in a non descript room, or us sharing an intimate moment.

That was specific. I felt the breeze I hd been thinking about. The trees around us elicited a sense of familiarity. All of it seemed so commonplace. Maybe I'm closer to finding out why I'm having these dreams. Obviously they have to do with Jade, but what do they _mean_?

...

"Hi Lane." I chirp, plopping down on his couch. He looks at me with wide eyes. "Well, hello Tori. You seem awfully chipper." "Yeah..." I sigh dreamily. After she calmed herself down Jade began a cavalcade of I'm sorrys, and after she calmed down again she drove me home. She blamed her forwardness on being a horn dog, but I know its us.

We're supposed to be together, and she must feel it too. I know why I feel so connected to her, but she doesn't. That combined with her self proclaimed impulsiveness, aptly justifies her behavior, I think.

"Care to share?" For the first time since yesterday my smile falls. What am I supposed to tell him? I skipped school to get groped by my literal dream girl? "I had a nice time with Jade yesterday." He looks giddy. "I'm so happy for you! Jade wouldn't tell me anything." He grumbles. "Has this had any affect on your dreams?" He asks hopefully. I hand him the note book. I wrote down a more school appropriate dream I had a couple days ago, and strayed from describing her too specifically.

Lane begins to frown as his eyes scan my first entry. He sighs and hands the book back. "I guess not." He says, likely to himself. He puts on a smile before addressing me properly. "Well, Rome wasn't built in a day. I'm sure if you take some time and explore this new aspect if your life, things will change."

"Sure." I respond, an equally false smile touching my lips.

...

I leave Lanes room to find Jade waiting for me again. "Hi." I greet, a little breathlessly. "Hey." She says, noting my reaction. "I thought... you would wanna like, eat lunch together again." She looks at me and after a moment I realize she's waiting for an answer. "Of course." I respond, and that little half smirk slides onto her face. She looks me up and down, then a second later her eyes meet mine and she holds out her hand.

When she was ranting apologizes she said something about just liking contact with me, on a mental level as well as physical. I slide my hand into hers and try to calm my insides as she walks me to the cafeteria.

...

"This school doesn't have that many options for me, so I always bring something from home. But my tables just over there-" I point to our usual spot. "Just go get your lunch and I'll meet you there." I smile brightly, but she looks at our joined hands and frowns. I roll my eyes. "Just hurry up." She laughs and kisses my cheek before heading off towards the lunch line. I shiver at the contact and practically skip towards the table.

"What're you so happy about?" Cat questions suspiciously as I take my seat. "I made a friend." Andre coos. "Oooh a friend! And might we assume she's of the girl variety?" I laugh and try to shake off the blush heating up my cheeks. "No...not exactly. We just met yesterday, shes new here." I explain. Robbie stops trying to feed his puppet and joins the conversation. "You don't mean Jade, do you?!" My enthusiasm subsides a bit, and I nod warily.

"She gave Ryder a black eye the first day of school! She's practically a legend already!" He exclaims. "A dangerous legend." Beck intercepts darkly. "Are you sure you should be hanging out with her?" He asks calmly. I resist the urge to call him mom. Becks always been like a brother to me. We met in middle school and ever since then hes been looking out for me, it makes sense he'd be worried about something like this.

"Trust me, she's not threat." I look at Robbie "Don't believe the hype." Beck nods and continues eating his meal. "Besides, Ryder had it coming." He freezes and raises a shocked eyebrow at me, and I have to laugh.


	6. Chapter 6

"Blue rivers, coursing under plains of tan dirt. _This_ is your inheritance."

I struggle to look away, just to turn my head, but I can't.

"Beside you, it breathes again, lives again. It's spirit rises with you, and you know it...look inside yourself, _deus tenebris._

Its cold blood in warm veins. Its blue blood, its tan skin. Colors she was born in. What I was given.

"You are stronger now, you grow with every meal. Feed _._ "

...

My knuckles bend white around my steering wheel while I replay the words in my head. I'm trying hard to keep the images out of it, focus on the road instead. I've always had nightmares, a result of the excessive amount of horror movies I watch. Usually I wake up, laugh, and just enjoy the free flick. Maybe even jot down some of the more exciting parts.

But this shit _scares_ me. I even tried to talk to my dad about it, but he just blamed it on the move before slinking back to his office, mumbling that he still had stuff to unpack. I guess that's what moms are for. I doubt he was actually busy though, hes never the same room as me for more than necessary.

But I still can't convince myself they're just nonsense. They feel so important. When they voice speaks, I have to listen. It makes so much sense when I'm asleep, but then I wake up and the meaning of the words it gone. All I'm left with is this sense that I'm supposed to _know_ something. I just keep forgetting.

I reach the school and contemplate just driving by the parking lot entrance. I like my car, I like having options. The best part about having a dad who can't look at you, is that he'll do pretty much anything to get you out of his face. A cars a nice consolation. I sigh and make the turn. I have things to look forward to.

Well, one thing.

...

I pick my tray up off the slider and scan the caf for the table she pointed out. I smile when I see it. It's almost full, but she outshines her companions. She's so vibrant, so full of life, so...fucking pretty. She talks animatedly, laughs so loud, smiles so wide. I smile dopily and walk towards her in a welcome trance, my eyes never leaving her.

She's sitting on the opposite side of the table I approach, and she directs a beaming smile towards me then rounds it. She grabs my hand and I scramble to steady my tray while being yanked back to her side and planted in the seat next to her.

"Guys, this is Jade!" She says excitedly, her hand lingering on my waist for a moment. It slides off and I almost frown before I think better of it. First impressions. "What's up." I nod, my eyes sweeping the table, landing on each of her friends for a moment. The little red head and the boy with the dreads look cool enough, kinda hot actually. And the crow rejects not that bad either. Add the freak with the puppet and her friends looks like one of those games.

ㇸ5 _One of these is not like the others_ I snicker to myself while they start introducing themselves. Cat, Andre, Beck, got it. Once again, the weird boy stands out, stuttering his name and trying to shake my hand. Gross.I stare at it with contempt until he puts it away. Tori frowns at me and I lean close and whisper innocently "It's been up a puppets ass all day." That makes her laugh and I lean back and watch her proudly. She shoves me lightly and I snake an arm around her waist, securing our proximity lest it happen again.

"So, what's your talent?" Beck interrupts the moment, and my opinion of him wanes. I narrow my eyes slightly, as if he accused me of not having one. "Piano." I answer. "You play piano?" Toris light voice draws my attention back to her. "Yes." I respond, voice just as light, nothing like when I answered Chris angel.

She smiles up at me awfully and doesn't speak. If I wasn't me I'd blush. "Finally! Another musician in the gang." Andre bellows. "Hey! I can play guitar!" Tori responds indignantly. Beck addresses her calmly "Yes. The four chords mandatory for your musical instrument requirement."

They all just laugh with him, including Tori, but my arm tightens around her waist protectively while I actively try not to growl. If I lose my cool I'm likely to do something I'll regret, so I push the 'mine, mine, mean to mine' impulses away and try to focus on the story the Cat launched into when the group stopped laughing.

And _woah_. I thought my family was fucked up. We carry on like that, just talking and trading stories. I try to keep my more biting comments to myself, and the funnier ones to Tori. I'm damn near polite for these people. Well, for her obviously.

She starts telling a story about walking in on her improv teacher doing something weird and she gets _so_ excited. She leans in to whisper when the story gets juicy and her shirt rides up an inch.

I bite my lip and try to appear nonchalant while I my fingers on her hip splay against the warm skin now pressed to my palm. She keeps talking but I'm close enough to see the lightest pink touch her cheeks. I grip her hip boldly and stretch them over the flat plain of her stomach and back again.

Her cheeks turn a shade darker, and I press my lips to one without thinking. She laughs and tries to play it off by finishing her story but all her friends are biting their cheeks and looking between us smugly and suddenly her lap is very interesting. I chuckle and gesture for her to continue with her story "And?"

She looks up to me briefly before continuing shyly. Soon enough though, she's into it again. Her embarrassments no match for her enthusiasm. She settles back into my side, and shes so warm. The whole thing feels really domestic. Natural. Familiar?

In the middle of her story a girl wearing way too much jewelry plops down at the table and interrupts her. "What're you guys doing this weekend?" She asks. Rude. Mine. Rude to mine. They all look at each other, sharing a look I don't recognize and I whisper to Tori "Who's the overdressed bobble head?" She snorts and quickly covers her mouth while everyone at the table turns and looks at her. Robbie starts to speak, drawing their focus away again. "Well I was gonna take Rex to see the new-"

"Great, cause I wanted to go to the beach to work on my tan, but I can't _possibly_ go alone, so I'm enlisting the help of my best buds." She says cheerily. Once again, they all look at each other. "She's your friend?" I whisper. Tori starts laughing again and shakes her head vehemently. When she finally calms down she puts a hand on my shoulder and catches her breath. "That's Trina, my sister." I look at Tori, and then the girl she claims has the same genes as her. "If you say so..."

Trinas eyes settle on us and take on a mischievous glint. "Tori..." she drawls "I'm sure you wanna come." Her eyes tilt up as she ponders. "Hot sun...Cold water...Volleyball..." Her eyes flick back to Tori "Bikinis." Toris eyes fill with fire, and so do her cheeks. "Trina!" She squeaks. And again, they all laugh except for me. And Tori.

As much as I agree with her, Tori's had enough of this. And I cant do anything about it. Are all her friends this nice to her? I sigh and do the only nice thing that comes to mind. I rest my chin on her shoulder and my free arm joins the other.

"I like the beach." She faces me and the anger in her eyes marginally simmers. "You do?" She says dazedly. I nod and she faces her sister again. "I guess we're in. What about you guys?" She looks to her friends and my arm tightens out of fondness this time. _We're._ Cool _._

 _..._


	7. Chapter 7

I squeeze my eyes shut and try to fall back asleep. Ultimately, I fail and snuggle further into my comforter, warm and encircling me, evoking recent memories of her arms doing the same. I lay here as long as I can, enjoying the blend of awake and sleep that lets me wallow in my dreams. But eventually my body wakes up and I'm forced to open my eyes. And use the bathroom.

I hop down the steps, taking them two at a time. "Good morning." I greet my mother warmly, maneuvering around her to turn on the keurig. She stares after me with wide eyes and a bewildered but happy smile. "Good morning, Tori. Sleep well?" I hold a box of different teas to my chest. " _Amazing_." I start fixing myself tea and cereal while she leans against the island and watches, but I'm unfazed by her confusion. Today is just too good a day.

Trina descends the stairs much less enthusiastically, but its still 8 o'clock on a Saturday. My mom looks at the clock while Trina steals my breakfast. "You guys are up early. Care to share?" Instead of yelling I just start making more food, only adding to this enigma. "Were going to the beach today." I say happily. "And that's whats got you excited enough to be up before noon?" She asks skeptically.

Trina looks up at her with lifeless eyes. "She's just happy she gets to perv on the new girl all day." She answers in monotone. That sours my mood a little, but I brush it off quickly. Tired Trina is a lot easier to ignore. My mom turns to me with an expectant look. "I _am_ excited Jade is coming." I offer.

I take my new breakfast and set it on the counter across from her. "This'll be date number two." I say excitedly, before swallowing a spoonful of cheerios. "Dates? Two!?" She says exasperatedly, looking between me and Trina, who just shrugs and moves to the couch. I've been dying to talk slash brag to her about Jade all week, but our relationship is so muddled. I just wanted to put in some real life hours before I reported back to mom.

"Well? Who is she? Tell me everything." She devolves into gossip mode, and I forfeit all appropriate knowledge. Unfortunately, remove all the juicy bits and all your left with is how we met and what she looks like. "She sounds...tough?" I nod, and so does she. "Well... That's nice." She says, looking away, seemingly mulling it over. "Yes, your father and I worry about you, you know. She could be a good influence on you." She says decidedly. I smile.

Thank god she's not apposed to me dating someone like Jade. The last thing we need is another hoop to jump through.

...

A wave of excitement washes over me while I watch Jades car pull into my drive way. As much as I hate Trina for saying it, a day at the beach will be awesome for Jade-watching. I back away from the window as she exits her car and wait for her to voluntarily make her presence know. She knocks at the door and I restrain from flinging it open. Instead I wait a couple seconds, then swing it open casually.

"Hey...Jade." I falter while taking in her outfit. Her dark hair is tied back, and revealing beautiful contours. Like her collarbones sharply outlining a white tee. She's so simple and yet, so painfully pretty. My eyes fall from her shorts down her long toned legs, and I gulp.

I shoot them back to her eyes and shes smiling so wide. She steps forward and wraps her arms around me tightly. "Hi." She says, in the closest thing to a squeal I've ever heard from her. "Um, hi." I reply dumbly, returning the embrace. She squeezes me tighter then releases me, taking a hand instead.

"Ready to go?" She asks. I squeeze her hand fondly and reply "Actually, Beck is coming to pick us up. He's driving everyone since he has that big trailer." She gives me a questioning look. "He sleeps in it, in his parents driveway." Her eyebrows shoot to her hairline. "His roof, his rules." I say plainly. "Ahh..." She says, and nodding slowly despite the clear confusion still lingering in her expression.

Until that cute little half smirk appears, although this time it has a devious edge to it. She lays a hand on my stomach, then slides it down suggestively and raises it again so the tips of her fingers tips are under my shirt. "Well, if we have some time, how about a sneak peak?" She says, eyes narrowed at her hand.

I swallow and choke out laugh, slapping it away. She moves her grasp to my hips and whines out a halfhearted please. "You can wait." I say surely, wrapping my arms around her neck and plucking absently at her swim suit tie. She looks at me oddly for a moment, then shakes her head. "Nope. I don't think I can." She sighs. "I might need something to tide me over." The look on her face appears down right _evil_ , and it does funny things to my insides, cause I've been studying her face long enough to know how she feels.

It's also sweet. The way her eyes crinkle at the corners give her away. I lift on my toes and press lips to hers chastely, and I feel her smile behind the kiss. I knew it. After a few moments she pulls away and begins pressing soft kisses to my neck, squeezing my hips pleasantly. "I missed you." She mumbles.

And I know exactly what she means. We haven't really gotten to touch each other all week, and I know it means more to her than me. I love just being around her, but I've noticed she gets a bit antsy when she's not touching me. I know restraints not something she enjoys, but PDA doesn't seem to be either.

"Gross. Okay, separate! Another human is in the room now!" Trina barks. I slide my hands to her shoulders but Jade doesn't pull away. "Hello to you too." She says, resting her temple on my shoulder and pressing a light kiss to my chin. Trina rolls her eyes but ignores her. "When is Beck going to be here?" She asks me. "Uh...in like 10 minutes..." I answer distractedly, as Jade hasn't stopped her barrage of affection. "Okay, well I'm going to wait in my room to avoid being scarred any more." She snaps derisively.

"You do that." Jade mumbles, and her hands start to wander up the back of my tank top, causing me to gasp. Trina shivers and lets out a yuck before hurrying up the stairs. "Can we wait in _your_ room?" I chuckle and shake my head, and she laughs to before growling and nipping my ear playfully. I laugh again. She's cute.

"You're cute." She pulls back and looks at me in mock shock. "Excuse me?" She asks. I smile up at her brightly. "You're cute." I repeat, just as simply as the first time. She pulls away completely and crosses her arms, but I don't miss the smile tugging at her lips. "Take it back." She replies sternly. "What?" I chuckle out.

She advances on me, making me stand in front of the couch before moving too close and shoving me lightly so my only choice is to fall back on it. "Take it back." She's full blown smiling now, and I join her. "No way, you're cute." I respond cheekily. She sighs dramatically and throws her head back before dropping onto the couch beside me.

"Tori, Tori, Tori." She meets my eyes. "You've got a lot to learn about me." I narrow my eyes at her, I don't know if I agree with that. "Give it time, you'll realize I'm anything but cute." She purrs, leaning in slowly. She turns and kisses my cheek, before settling into my side. She picks up my arm and drops it over her shoulders and then gets comfy again.

She just got here and shes already left me breathless twice, effortlessly I might add. I sigh and rest my head on hers, I missed this too. My dreams are no comparison for her, really.

...

Were in a similar position now, spread out on a big beach towel with her head on my arm. The sun seeps into my skin, warming me to my core. But it reflects off Jades, giving her this heavenly glow. If it wasn't so bright I might never look away. Not too far into the water I can make out the girls, Beck, and Robbie playing chicken. I smile as I imagine how loud Cat is screaming right now. Andres next to us messing with his 'vintage' boom box his grandma gave him, until something catchy starts playing and he finally relaxes.

I feel like that's enough of a break, and I go back to roaming Jades ethereal form. She's wearing sunglasses and her head is turned away from me, I think she might be trying to sleep. She must feel me staring cause after a few moments she stirs. She stretches her arms, then pulls them back closely while turning on her side. Her head on my shoulder, her hand on my stomach, the sun isn't the only thing keeping me warm anymore.

"Im hungry." She says. "Okay, Andre, what's in the cooler?" I ask. He pops off the lid and shifts around a few things. "We got water and...soda." He answers cheerfully. I look back to Jade and she's pouting. I search the beach until spot a little ice cream cart. I point it out and she nods quickly. "That's perfect." I curl my arm around her head and lift her sunglasses, kissing the bridge of her nose lightly before letting them go. "Get me one too?" She sighs dramatically but agrees.

I'm waiting for her to return when something blocks my sun. "Um, hi." Hes tall, nervous, and inarguably handsome. Too bad the only person I've ever looked twice at is getting me a cone.

I sit up on my elbows and smile up at him, genuinely sorry I'm going to have to upset him soon. It's a lovely day, what a bummer. "Hi." He looks relieved for a moment, then nervous again. "Um, I'm Mark. And that's-" he gestures behind him "Tom. We were wondering if, um, if you wanted to play volleyball with us?"

Hmm, that actually sounds like fun. "Maybe later." I answer kindly. "Cool." He huffs proudly. "Uh, do you mind if I hang out till then?" He doesn't even seem sure of that, and my smile falters. "She's taken bro." Andre calls. His face turns beet red and he throws his hands up in defense. "Sorry man. I didn't mean to hit on your girlfriend. Im not like tha-"

We both laugh and he looks between us, confusion evident. I'm about to explain when Jade comes back. She drops to her knees beside me, pecking my lips before handing me a cone. She settles indian style beside me and looks at him with what I assume is a sunglass-concealed death glare. "What'd I miss?" Marks face is comically embarrassed, but shes not laughing. "This is Mark. He was inviting us to a volleyball game." I tell her, busying myself with licking my ice cream. " _All_ of us?" She asks skeptically.

I may not have any classes with her, but we do manage to chat a little in the hallways and at lunch. Unfortunately a lot of people have that idea and I've had to calm her down on more than one occasion already. It seems so ridiculous to me. Guys have been asking me out long before she was real and I never strayed. She doesn't know shes the only one for me. Silly.

"Yu-Yes. Yes of course." He stutters. "Obviously...all of you..." He mutters lamely. "We'll uh, be over there." He says before disappearing. I know Jades looking at me but I'm so happy to have my sun back, I ignore her. No bummers today. She keeps doing it so I finally look at her, and I instantly feel guilty. She's sad.

"What's wrong?" I ask. She looks away. "Nothing." She deadpans. Okay, so minor bummers today. I switch my ice cream between hands and trail my fingers over hers. She looks at our hands and smiles slightly. "I feel dumb." My fingers squeeze hers reassuringly, and she elaborates.

"Like...I wanna be a possessive asshole, but I get the feeling you don't _like_ possessive assholes. But I don't like guys hitting on you, which is the whole 'dumb' thing cause were not even dating so like, what right do I have to rip some guys head off? And I'm not saying you should wear something that says property of Jade West but how awesome would that be?" I try not to laugh but it fights its way out and she rolls her eyes and looks away again.

"See, its so fucking dumb." She mumbles and I shake my head in protest. "No no, I get it, its just...relax okay? I'm not going anywhere." I smile warmly, holding her gaze until she returns it. Satisfied, I go back to eating my ice cream.

She wants me to be hers. I mean I have been for so long, but she wants me. I watch her eat. Full lips make the action almost sensual. I I blush and avert my eyes to are hands. Hers is pale and slight, looking wonderful woven with my tan one.

Maybe...maybe shes mine too.

I lift her hand to my lips and kiss it. "Okay, I'll stop sulking." She mumbles, but I'm not really listening. She lays down and I follow her. I insert myself under her arm, and she allows it. I kiss her cheek, her chin, her neck, and she hums in approval. This is exhilarating. It finally occurs to me, I'm no longer a passenger, watching our interactions go by. I get a say, and she likes that.

...

Don't freak out. Be normal. Hold a conversation. Act like you cant feel her steady hands on your hips, keeping you in place everytime Becks truck takes a turn. But I can.

A few more sharp turns and strong arms envelope me. I sink back contentedly, finally relaxing into the comforting hold. She rests her chin on my shoulder and I close my eyes. The sounds of my friends chatter is lulling, even more so when Jade replies eliciting a rumble from her chest behind me. The endless jostles of the road, the warmth, my belly full of ice cream, I fall asleep.

"Hey, were almost there." A low voice whispers. I blink once, twice, and face her. "There being?" I ask groggily. She laughs before answering. "Home." I smile dopily, finally remembering the events of today. "I had a dream about you." She smiles. "Really? Just now?" I nod, before sinking back into her arms again. She shifts so she can rest her chin on my head.

Trinas passed out of the couch across from us, and I almost fall back asleep when she speaks again. "Was it nice?" I close my eyes and images of soft lips and softer skin rise in the blackness. "Yes."

...

When we reach my house, Jade bypasses her car and comes inside, much to my delight. We sit on the couch, hands still joined, while Trina channel surfs at the other end, much to my dismay.

Jade looks nervous, like she wants to speak. I give Trina a pointed look for the thousandth time, and again, she ignores me. I turn to Jade with an apologetic smile. She looks at me, then at are joined hands.

Her thumb starts rubbing my hand and she opens her mouth a few times before she lets out a small huff and speaks so softly. "I just want you to be mine..." And I have to fight the urge to laugh. Instead I gently press my lips to hers. "I already am, dummy."

"Already?" She teases with a small smile. "Right?" Trina cheers from behind me. I actually forgot she was here for a moment. Now I'm painfully aware of her presence and I glare at her. "You don't date anyone. Like, ever. And then all the sudden your all over this girl? You don't date, you never date!" She looks to Jade "I mean never-" "Trina!" I yell. She shrugs. "I was just trying to convey how special she must be." She explains slowly. "Thank you." I snap, then turn back to Jade, who wears a light pink on her cheeks.

She's right. You are special. How could I date someone else when the love of my life was waiting for me. Had I _known_ you were waiting, it might have made the last three years a little easier, but still. I love you. And _only_ you. I could tell you, ease some of your doubt. But no, I'm cursed to slowly convince you to love me too first. Then again, the way your looking at me makes me think that might not be that hard. Or enjoyable.


	8. Chapter 8

_Ego fluctibus demersi doloris mei gaudete in templis. Mea dolore sunt questus peius . Ego sum qui minni minus certa . Et intumescent fluctus aquarum sensum, concaluit cor sentio et postquam in litore relictam hospes aquam recedere . Ego erosis abluit . Ego potest non agnoscere myself ._

"AHHHhhhh..." I wake up with a scream that bleeds into heavy breaths. I see a light come on outside my room and footsteps sound till a shadow stands outside my door. I can picture him, hand poised about to knock. Ultimately he decides not to check on me. Well that hurts. I close my eyes and pull the covers over my head, letting images of bronze skin and caramel eyes chase away the haunting images accompanied by words I didn't understand. Words spoken by _me._

...

"...I guess if you really think that'll- Jade!" I smile uncontrollably as she spots me, all but forgetting the troubles of this morning. "Hi." I respond before shes crushing me in a hug. Thin arms leave my waist while she kisses me chastely. She turns back to Lane to finish their conversation but I'm not done with her yet. "I think it will-" "Hey..." I shake her lightly in my arms and her attention shifts. "I have an idea."

...

I could die here. With her arms around me, my face buried in her neck, I could die. Soft strands of brown hair surrounding me, warm breath rustling my own, I'm ready. How could it possibly get better than this?

Earlier this week I invited her to sleepover today, Friday. At school this morning she tumbled out of her sisters car with an extra bag and tossed it into mine with the biggest smile on her face. She wrapped her arms around me and squeezed tight, telling me how excited she was.

After we got here and I gave her the full tour. We almost made it through the whole house before my dad skulked out of his office at the sound of two voices. He gave me the craziest look before stuttering out "Who-who's your friend?" I don't blame him for being surprised. I never bring friends to my house. But Toris much more than that, she deserves to know me.

"Shes Tori, my girlfriend." I replied before continuing our walk through the house. I had to physically move Tori along to keep her from properly introducing herself. She was a little irked at that but when I told her it was for the best she reluctantly forgave me.

After that I showed her my room, the entire basement. It has a subsection that serves as my actual bed room, but the whole floor is mine. It has a mini fridge and a microwave, a couch and a Tv. Even a little bathroom. It keeps me from bumping in to my dad. It was his idea, but not a bad one. I like having my own space. It prevents the sitcom-esque interruption of parents whilst cuddling your girlfriend through a horror move.

I just chuckle while she jumps at scares I've seen a thousand times. I don't even have to see the screen to know whats going on. The little girl looks in the mirror and scream in 3,2,1...

 _"Grroonk..."_

Well I wasn't expecting that. Was that a snore? Did she fall asleep during one of the best horror movies of this decade?! I'm shocked, offended! I'd be _more_ offended if it wasn't so cute, but still, were gonna have to work on this. But for now, I snuggle further into her neck and resign myself to sleep.

"...eres tan hermosa..." Oh my god. "...y es tan caliente aquí..." Oh my _god_. She talks in her sleep. She speaks _Spanish_ in her _sleep_. "...me encanta..." I'm in love. Should I wake her up? I hover over her. Tori, beautiful and smiling, even in her sleep. I press my lips to hers. "...uno mas..." I laugh and do it again, more firmly this time.

When I pull away she blinks a few times before opening her eyes a sliver and grinning up at me like an idiot. A gorgeous, gorgeous idiot. "Mmm, gracias." She hums. Yup. Love. I cup her jaw and trace its edges with my thumbs, and my eyebrows meet on my forehead. "You're _so_ cute." I tell her. "I'm anything but cute." She says in a voice I assume is supposed to be me. "I don't talk like that." I snap, and she laughs.

She sits upright, stretches, yawns, grows more confused the more she wakes up. "Did I miss the movie?" She asks, fixing her little doe eyes back on me. "Who cares? Tell me what you were dreaming about." I answer playfully. She blushes and looks away. "Uh...why?"

"Cause I don't speak Spanish, now spill." Her face turns even redder. "I was talking in my sleep again?" She asks petulantly. I nod and push her back down on the couch and lay on her again. I hook my hands behind her knees and pull them up on either side of me, keeping her close.

"Was it about me again?" I ask hopefully. She bites her lip and nods slowly. I've had some dreams about her and by the few things I could understand they might be in line with each other, and definitely something I wanna here about. I trace the column of her neck with my nose and feel her swallow.

"Tell me about it."

...

This installment is brought to you by google translate.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N I didn't have wifi for a long time, but I'm back now. With a good outline and a few chapters already finished.

...

She settles between my legs and it spreads a pleasant warmth through my body. Her lips on my neck have the opposite affect, and send chills with every contact. "Tell me about it." She demands in a whisper. I try to come up with an answer that will placate her curiosity without revealing too much but then her hands slide under my shirt, radiating heat.

So instead of responding, I shake my head no. "Pleeaase..." She purrs, dragging out the word against my skin. I shake my head no again, maybe with a bit more vigor. She just smiles and kisses my neck again, then above the collar of my shirt, then over my stomach. She finishes her descent and bends her legs up behind her, playful and cute.

"Please?" She asks again, meeting my eyes while pushing my shirt up a little. I bite my lip and shake my head again, I like the way she asks. She sighs and mutters "Okay..." before breaking eye contact and beginning kissing my exposed stomach. I sigh happily and tangle my hands in her hair, massaging her scalp, stroking behind her ears. She suddenly looks up at me again, eyes serious as she presses a kiss right over my bellybutton.

A smile pulls at the corner of her mouth and then shes blowing raspberries, making me laugh and twist and pull her hair. None of these things faze her though, she only ever pauses to ask me if I'm ready to tell her yet. Eventually, I'm forced to choose between telling her or peeing my pants and I concede.

"Okay, okay I'll tell you!" I squeal. She stops for a moment, raises a suspicious eyebrow and hovers her lips above my stomach. "No I will! Just..." I breath out and curl my fingers around her ears to hold her head. "...stop, please." I say as sweetly as I can, giving her the most affectionate smile possible while out of breath. She smiles back and dusts off my stomach before resting her chin there.

"I'm waiting." She drawls. Okay, answers. "Um..I don't know..." I stall. "We were some place warm..." I smile fondly and continue. "Really warm. And we were...hanging out." I finish awkwardly, wringing my hands and conveniently blocking her eyes. She hoists her self up and crawls back over me so were face to face. She studies my pout for a moment, then connects our lips. She slowly lowers herself down again and I squeeze her waist between my legs.

I try not to smile and pull her closer by her collar. After a while she pulls back and whispers "Like this?" I'm glad she's so close cause I'm sure shes smirking right now and seeing that would make saying "Yeah." a lot harder.

She kisses me again with so much passion, it reminds me of our first kiss in her car, so heated, so desperate. I trail my fingertips over her lower back and maybe shes ticklish there because her hips buck into me and I'm moaning into her mouth. She pulls away and breathes deeply before speaking. "Is this okay? Do you wanna keep going?" I nod but clarify "Yeah, but can we can- can we just keep kissing?" Her expression becomes stern and she answers "Of course, I want you to feel safe with me... I want to make you feel safe." She says it so earnestly, my heart warms and I'm stealing her close for another kiss.

...

I wake up in a bed that is surely not my own, yet I feel just as comfortable. Maybe its the warmth of recent memories, or Jades expensive lush bed set, but my moneys on the soft piano tones floating into the room that has me so at ease. I follow the sound almost instinctually, and I'm lead upstairs and into a room Jade breezed by on her tour.

I find her in the center of the room playing broad sweeps on a large piano. Shes still in her pajamas and her hair is messy from sleep but the peace she displays while playing ties the whole scene together before me. She looks...lovely. And she plays so well! I'm about to tell her when she starts to sing.

Her low voice tumbles from her lips as she sings a declaration of love. Her voice is fine and well disciplined, but I understand why she neglected to tell me she sings too. Her voice pales in comparison to the skill of her fingers, expertly dancing across the keys in long, sweeping scales. The words seem like an after thought, incomparable to the soul pouring from her hands onto the keys. Everytime she plays louder she leans forward, and when she's not singing she's biting her lip, eyes closed in passion. It's beautiful. Shes beautiful.

"You're beautiful." I tell her, or rather blurt out. Her eyes open for a moment and focus on me in the doorway, until her hands, never stilling, draw her back in again. She bows her head over the keys and plays another sweep and my heart expands with the sound. I want to touch her. I take a few steps forward and she stops playing to greet me.

"Good-" "No, don't stop. That was...lovely." I praise with my former observation, completely enamored. She smiles (and possibly blushes?) and scoots over on the bench. I sit by her and watch her flex her hands before playing again. My eyes shift from her fingers graceful movements to her lips spilling out philosophies about birth signs and love. She makes it look so effortless.

When shes finished with her song I applaud her, and she laughs and sluggishly wraps her arms around my shoulders. "Good morning." She sighs, burying her nose in my neck and humming the tune of the song she just played. " _Great_ morning," I correct "that was beautiful." She chuckles lightly and continues her nuzzling. "I don't mind waking up to that." I continue. She draws her head back and gives me a blank look. "Or you."

She rolls her eyes and rustles my hair before moving to stand. I stop her. "Wait, Jade. Can we talk? About yesterday?" She looks scared but she sits back down. "Look, I'm sorry if I was moving too fast but I promise I would never do anything-"

"No! God no, Jade. I know that, I meant...I meant about...your dad." Her look of concern morphs into an angry scowl and she faces the piano. "What about him?" She asks stiffly. I recoil at her tone but ask "How come you didn't want us to meet?" She presses down on a few keys and still doesn't face me. "I didn't want you to meet him. Hes not... my _biggest_ fan..."


	10. Chapter 10

"No, that's me." She says sweetly, partially succeeding in cheering me up. "Do you wanna talk about it?" Her hand is on my shoulder and shes smiling reassuringly, and I'm almost convinced. That if I explain it to her, just how justified his apathy towards me is, she wont agree. Almost.

If anything, her understanding is the biggest reason not to. Its too good to risk loosing, shes too good to lose. I shake my head no and angle it back towards the keys. Her hand slips from my shoulder and I snap my eyes up to her, dreading the loss of contact. I catch sight her thoughtful frown before she puts on a smile. "If you ever do..."

"I'll come straight to you." I finish, and she smiles for real. She kisses me softly, for the first time today, and I'm reaffirmed in my decision. Just too good. Her hand lingers on my cheek after, and I fight the urge to turn my face into it. Instead I hold her eyes and try to memorize each fleck of gold mixed into her soft brown irises, and I'm overcome with affection. The feeling is overwhelming and familiar, like everything with her is.

"I will keep the color of your eyes when no other in the world remembers your name." Her eyes squint in the sweetest of ways. "What?" She asks softly, bemused. I shake my head and turn back to the keys. "Its from a movie." I answer dismissively, and start to play again. "There's this tree... She holds the boy close, tells him she loves him. And even though he'll die, she'll always remember him." I feel her looking at me, no doubt at the blush I feel heating up my cheeks. "There is no immortality but a tree's love." I recall wistfully. She presses her hand to a burning cheek, and I already feel so vulnerable right now. I give in. I bury my nose into her palm.

...

"We have to go. Lunch is almost over." I so don't care. "I don't care. I haven't gotten you alone in days." She pulls back and gives me that motherly look that means she's about to scold me. "Jade, we hung out like two days ago." I shoot a look back. "And your sister was there the whole time." She gives me a shy smile and blushes a little. "Didn't stop you..." She mutters.

"That was me being good." I lead. She bites her lip and her eyes narrow on me, taking the bait. "So whats you being bad?"

...

We stumble into the caf hand in hand. I'm still giddy but Toris mood has simmered with the amount of visible marks I've left on her. I tug her close and whisper "You asked for it." We sit down at our table and she glares at me. Oh well, they look good on her.

"Where have you two been?" Beck asks, and I roll my eyes. Toris actual mom trusts me more than this dude. I give a pointed look to Toris marred skin. "Guess." She blushes and pulls her collar up to cover herself. "Jade, stop..." She halfheartedly chastises through her embarrassment. I shrug and happily go about seeing what Harris has left me.

This isn't the first time we've been late for lunch, and I get cranky when I don't eat. So when it seems like I'll miss the lunch line he saves me something to keep me at bay. This time its a whole burger. I stage gasp and take a huge bite. My eyes roll back comically and I groan. "What did I do to deserve this?" I ask. He looks down at the table and I see the sheet music for the composition I helped him with for our Score Writing class, with a big A in the corner. "Guess."

I laugh and place an arm over him. "Oh yeah, you're totally my bitch forever." I quote, and I hear a shriek from across the table. Cats covering her ears and her face is all scrunched up. "Jade, language!" Tori scolds. I release Harris and my jolly demeanor falls. "Oh, sorry." I put my hand on the table in front of Cat to get her attention and she uncovers an ear. "I'm sorry, Cat."

She smiles widely and squeals "I forgive you!" What the? I will never understand that girl. One minute she's got me feeling all guilty for using a _word,_ and the next shes fine. I look at her bewildered, and turn to Tori to see if she shares in my confusion. Instead shes stifling a laugh. Now its my turn to glare.

...

We spend the weekends making up for lost time, taking turns spending the night at each others houses. I don't think I've ever been happier. They days at my house are romantic. The first day I try to teach her piano, and she insists on sitting in my lap. My hands cover her own and I brush my lips against her ear while I murmur instructions. She did try to learn at first, but lately I just play with her lounging in my lap, forehead pressed to my neck while she hums along, sometimes sings. On livelier days she'll even dance for me. The nights have us huddled close on my bed, wound in each others arms, talking about things I used to keep to myself. Everything's just so easy with her. I tell her things about me I thought no one would care about, and she treats every one like a precious secret.

Days at her house are much more jovial. Her family keeps us from getting too wrapped up in each other, but they do keep us entertained. One minute were watching TV and the next were helping Trina make props for some bizarre play. At night I'm snuck inside through her window. The rebelliousness of the act always gets her worked up, and we spend hours rolling around her bed, lip locked. We never go further than that, and even though it usually takes me a minute to calm down after, falling asleep with her is worth anything.

Going to bed alone is nearly impossible now. My bed isn't warm without her next to me, and gripping my pillow doesn't have the same calming affect her soft sentient form provides. I need to hold her hand, rest my head on her shoulder, just talk. Cause Tori listens to me. Her responses are inquisitive and specific it just feels so...good. Her body under me, around me, fingers in my hair. I can be surrounded by her, I can be calm, I can be sweet. I keep her close, close like bumping noses, close. Enjoying the tingling feeling that accompanies these moments, like when her fingers trail under my shirt and up my back, then slowly down again. Tender enough to tickle, slow enough to keep me from squirming.

I don't think I've ever been happier.

...

A/N Thoughts?


	11. Chapter 11

I rest my forehead against Jades an let my cool breaths fan out over her face in an attempt to speed up her process. Her hands are behind me, twisted tightly in my shirt. Her eyes, black as coal a minute ago, are closed now. Her face contorts in strain as she tries to calm down.  
While it's definitely an ego boost to know that I work her up so much, I feel terrible (and slightly off put...) that a little impromptu make out session can leave her so inept. The least I can do is offer my silent support. A few more minutes and she opens her eyes, as green and intense as ever. Her hands untwist from my shirt and take a gentle hold of me. I relax against her and rest my head on her chest, hearing her heart finally beat at a regular pace.  
A few more minutes of this and shes asleep, lips lightly pressed to my crown, gracing it with warm exhales every few seconds. I carefully detangle myself from her and slide off the bed. Knowing Jade she'll be hungry when she wakes up, so a meal at the ready could earn me a few brownie points. As I make my way upstairs though, I hear rustling in the kitchen. "Um...hello?" I call out cautiously. The noises stop and as I creep around the corner, Jades father comes into view.  
"Oh, hello." He sounds almost surprised, but its hard to tell. The West's are hard to read, and if I didn't have years decoding the subtle changes in Jades body language and expressions her emotions might be a total mystery to me.  
"Hi, . It's great to officially meet you." I say cheerfully, extending a hand. He stares at it for a moment, before shaking it and replying "Yes, she...doesn't really want us talking, does she?" My eyes fall to the floor. "No." He grunts in response and his eyes rake over me. "I must confess, you're not what I expected."  
"How so?" He sighs deeply. "Although I've never thought about her dating, I would've thought she'd pick someone more...like her." He shakes his head. "I'm surprised, almost happy to see her with some one so...nonthreatening." My eyes snap up to him. "Excuse me?"  
"I mean nice, you seem...nice." He answers cryptically. "Though I do worry for you." I shift uncomfortably where I stand. "Um, why?" I ask dumbly. "My daughter isn't like you. She's not so...nice." The distaste in the word suggests a plethora of negative descriptions he feels would be more appropriate for describing her. So I focus on the surge of protective anger his words cause, fueling my courage to ask him what Jade won't tell me.  
"Mr. West, why don't you like Jade?" He sighs again. He leans against the kitchen counter and folds his arms, his movements slow and listless. "I'm afraid. I'm afraid of her." He says it so calmly, its disturbing. "Jades mother, she was like you. Sweetest, kindest...most forgiving woman I've ever met. So when our unborn child started to drain her, relentlessly, she acquiesced." His voice wavers between emotionless and angry as he speaks, and mind drifts back to Jade playing her sweeping scales. I hear them echoing behind his words, almost paralleled.  
"I watched my wife, so beautiful once, whither away while Jade grew. Kicking, struggling, so restless within her. Every day was a challenge. And when Jade was born, she lost. And so did I. The anniversary is coming up..." His voice breaks and he rubs his wrist against a dry eye.  
I use the time to think, but its hard to come up with anything meaningful with all this new information. "You mean your daughters birthday?" He nods quickly, ferociously. "I tried to do the right thing. Love her, like she was the only thing left of her. But she wasn't, she's not." He takes a deep breath and speaks with a quiet conviction.  
"Shes the reason my wife is gone, and she's spent years reminding me. Do you know how cruel I felt? Watching my two year old stare at the wall endlessly... and-and feeling so disconnected from her, so scared. It tore me up inside. And then when she finally developed a personality its was so...brash! All she wanted to do was watch these gory movies, and how she'd laugh!" He exclaims, almost like a question, maybe a joke.  
"Whenever some one died, it seemed the more undeserved the death the wider she'd smile... I know I'm not the best father, but despite whatever she is, despite what she did to my wife, I didn't smother her in her sleep. I never hit her or yelled or blamed her out loud. I know, wherever my wife is now, she'd absolutely hate me if I ever hurt Jade."  
My eyes are saucers, I can't speak. No frigging- No fucking wonder Jade didn't want us to speak! The mans absolutely crazy! Crazy and...and cruel! And Jade...poor Jade...  
"Youre crazy!" I shout. I can tell I've startled him because his eyes are a bit wider, but he still has this eerie languid demeanor about him. "She's your daughter, how could you say those things!" His eyes are wild now, and I step back hesitantly as he approaches. He takes my hands and looks into my eyes deeply. And I let him, too terrified to move. "She's not my daughter. She's not normal. I don't know how long you've know her but trust me..."  
The idea that hes going to say another awful thing about her jumpstarts my limbs, and I yank my hands away. I stumble towards Jades room, I'd run if I had the strength to keep my momentum up. I nearly trip down the stairs and only slow down once I'm outside the door to her subsection. My hand shakes as I turn the knob and some part of me, delirious and scared, expects to see a monster lying there.  
But instead its Jade. Soft, soft and peaceful while she sleeps. I swallow the urge to cry and make my way to her. As I take my place next to her she stirs, before turning and draping an arm over me. I hold onto it like its a life raft, and look to her calm face like a lighthouse. I am surely drowning.

Jade, otherworldly beautiful. Confident in movement, abrasive in speech, sweet when were alone. Jade, the girl of my dreams. Literally. I know that's not normal, but it couldn't mean that Jade is evil. I think of the way she speaks to me, holds me, kisses me. There are a lot of adjectives I could use to describe Jade, at times sinful, but never evil.  
Maybe this is what the dreams are for. To show her to me, make me love her before we met so I'm ready to save her. Already willing to take her away from her creep of a dad. I scowl deeply as involuntary memories our conversation flood my mind. I've been trying to avoid them and I'm dreading the moment when Jade finally talks to me about him. At least I won't be as blindsided as when her father told me.  
I can be ready this time, I can practice. Tell her he's crazy, and she is too if she believes shes anything but perfect. I'll tell her... I'll tell her I love her. That I always have, and I always will. I smile fondly, remembering the quote she told me. Sweet words carried on soft piano tones, she played with the keys shyly. Shes way too sweet to be a monster, no matter how much she tries to convince people she is. Or vice versa.  
Just then a knock comes at my window, and it'd be a coincidence if she wasn't always on my mind. I draw back my curtains and there's Jade, squatting on my roof with her bottom lip caught between her teeth, fingers drumming on the sill with anticipation. I unlock the barrier and I'm almost immediately tackled into my room.  
Her strong arms wind around my back and keep me upright, and I can feel her smiling behind the kiss. When it brakes I stare up at her and blink in surprise. "I missed you." She huffs between gulps of air. I look into her bright green eyes and shes so happy, how could anyone not love her? She kisses me again, and when I try to pull away she grabs my cheeks and holds me close. I smile faintly and resign my self to her lips.  
The fingers of one hand tap my cheek playfully, and we break the kiss with soft laughter. I wrap my arms around her neck and sag against her in the embrace. She entered my room with the same exuberance she always does, and I fear it's making my less than ecstatic mood more apparent.  
"I missed you too." She senses a graveness in my tone and frowns. "Are you okay?" I look up and there's a certain direness in her eyes, like if I say the suns too bright she'll knock it down. "Yeah." I choke out unconvincingly. My eyes shoot away from hers in the rapture of my pain, my embarrassment. She leans closer and brushes her lips against mine, leveling our eyes. "You can tell me." I almost laugh, or maybe sob at the irony. I just said this to her less than a week ago about her father and the discomfort he brings her. She does it again and exhales a shaky breath against my lips. "If I did something, you can tell me."  
I kiss her halfheartedly then withdraw from her arms to sit on my bed. "No, its not you...its me." She smiles distantly, there's a panic in her eyes. "Uh oh." Another ghost of a smile. I shake my head and extend a hand to her. She smiles gratefully and takes it, sitting beside me. She lays her head on my shoulder and I'm quiet for a minute, gathering my thoughts, courage, and waiting untill shes absolutely comfortable.  
She breathes out heavily, contentedly, and her head angles up a bit. I feel her nose under my jaw, and I can almost see the smile that's surely gracing her lips. "Waitin' on you." She says softly. And god, do I love her. I turn my head and meet her lips, softly at first, but when she tries to deepen it I move back. Not too far though, close enough that I still have to whisper. I keep my eyes closed and just force it out. "I talked to your dad."  
"What?" She asks softly. I open an eye and see that hers are still closed, and I think she was making to kiss me again before I spoke. Now her eyebrows are gathered. "What?" She asks again, but with much more anger. Her eyes open and the ferocity swirling in those vibrant green irises is frightening. "I talked to your dad and he told me-" "What!?" She yells, so loud I jump in place and half expect my dad to come running in.  
"What did he tell you?" She says with measured rage. "Everything." She huffs out a broken laugh and gets up, heads for the window. "Where are you going?" I ask, and she freezes. Her balled fist twitches by her side and she faces me again. "I'm going to leave. I'm very angry right now, and I don't feel like proving him right." She says with the same thinly veiled anger behind forced calmness. "Right about what, Jade?" I ask, exasperated.  
"About being a monster." She says, curtain coming down. "Jade, youre not-" I stand and mean to approach her but she yells again, halting me. "Cause you'd fucking know!" I glance behind me at the door and she takes the hint and lowers her voice. "You went... behind my back so you could weasel your way into knowing this-" I try to interject "Shut up! I wasn't comfortable with you knowing this about me, so you fucking get it from the source?! Fuck you, Tori!"  
I open my mouth but I'm at a loss for words. I know what I did was wrong but I didn't know how dark their problems were. I knew it was personal and maybe I intruded on that but I don't deserve this...Oh hell, maybe I do, but it still hurts. "Fuck you..." She says again, although quieter. Tears spill uncontrollably from my eyes when I reach for her and she jerks away. "I'm so sorry Jade, I didn't mean to. He was just being so cruel, I couldn't take it anymore. I thought-" I pause and laugh humorlessly "I thought he was just a jerk, Jade. And that if he told me why he was I could show him why he should love you like...like..." I do. "Like he should." I finish.  
She surges forward with an accusatory finger and tells me I had no right, but the rage is gone. I sit back down at the head of my bed and stare at my hands lying limp in my lap. "I know." I reply miserably. "Jesus, are you crying?" She asks in the same accusing tone. "Yes." I sniffle indignantly. "Shit, dude I'm sorry, okay? Is that what you wanna hear?" I glare up at her in a mix of anger and disbelief. She looks to the ceiling for a moment then back at me. She kneels beside me on the bed. "I suck at this, okay? I suck." She reaches for my hands but I pull away. I don't want to touch her right now, I don't think either of us deserve the comfort.  
I see a look a panic flash across her eyes. "Tori I'm sorry." She says pointedly and grasps for me again. "No, Jade." I say quietly, refusing to look at her directly. I see a look of pure terror come over her out of the corner of my eyes, though.  
"Tori, please come closer. Please just come closer." I look at the pained expression on her face and reluctantly comply. Instantly Jades arms enfold me and she kisses me. I pull back. "See? Its not just 'closer', Jade." I wrap my arms around myself, and she does the same to my whole torso. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."  
"Stop that. Don't say that, if your sorry you wouldn't do it." I reason quietly. Jade buries her face in my neck. "No, I don't regret touching you... I'm just sorry I need to, I'm sorry I'm like this..." she says, almost sobs. "I'm sorry I'm so sorry..." she mutters between pressing kisses to my skin. This is all too much...How do I fight with her when she needs me so much? When we need each other...  
I guess we just explain ourselves, be as honest and as... forgiving as possible.  
"I know you like touch but I just need some space after the things you said. And you should too." I phrase my last sentence like a question, and Jade goes rigid and pulls back. "I just need to feel you, to make sure you still care. To show you that I still care." She explains. "Normal people express that with words." Jade pulls away completely.  
"What if I'm not normal." No... I take her chin. "No baby, I didn't mean it like that." Her eyes close and tears spill down her cheeks and onto my palm. "But I did. I have- I have these dreams..." She sobs, and my heart rate picks up. "Are they about me?" Jade nods through tears. "I think so..." I wrap her rocking frame in her arms. "Its okay, I have them too."


	12. Chapter 12

"You do?" She nods and takes my face in her hands, thumbs damming rivers of tears. "Yes, and... I think I know why." She says sweetly, eyes falling to my lips as her thumb brushes over one gently, idly. "You do?" I ask, voice weak with hope. "I think," Her eyes flick back up to mine while her thumb continues its calm ministrations. "they're to make me love you." She says with a smile. Love? I...  
"Tori, no..." I shake my head and her hands fall to my shoulders. " I know it seems soon but Jade, I do _love_ you. I've loved you since I first saw you... long before we met." She finishes nervously, smile excited, eyes shy.

"Tori I don't-" "Shhh..." She hushes me, thumb brushing my lip again. "Its okay if you don't feel it yet. I know its kind of weird to fall in love with a girl in your dreams, but I did." Love? Me? What is happening? How could those _nightmares_ make her _love_ me? I take her hands off my shoulders and hold them in my own. "Tori, what do you dream about?" I ask seriously, and shoots me and odd look.

"I dream about you." She says, like it was natural. "I dream about loving you, us loving each other. We'll be in different places, in what seems like different times..." She trails off thoughtfully, before smiling at me and continuing. "But were always together, and we're always happy."

Shes beaming at me, and I can tell shes practiced what she just said. I wonder how long shes waited to tell me. "How long? Have you had them." I ask. "Since I was fourteen, you?" The same. "Me too." I laugh darkly. Of course Tori has these sweet dreams, memories? Whatever they are, and I have the dark ones. Fitting. "Whatever they are, whatever they mean, whatever we are; We'll figure it out together." She tells me. Whatever we are. For a second I think she means romantically, but no. We might not be...

I've been getting weirder lately. More base. My thoughts have become more simplistic, like when I'm with Tori all I think is 'good smell' or 'pretty eyes'. Food is meat and good. Dad is old and bad. So when she kisses me, my head clouds over with soft and strawberry and _safe_.

And I could use some goddamn security.

Oblivious to my inner ramblings she breaks off the kiss, eyes lingering on mine as a gentle invitation to keep close. She lays back and I instantly surround her, savoring the warmth that comes from her being next to me. "Jade, your uh...choking me." She teases. I ease my hold but glare up at her. "Shut up okay. You don't know what its like not being able to touch you." I expect more teasing but shes quiet for a moment.

"You could tell me about." She almost whispers. I look up at her again and she quickly adds "If you want." I shake my head and bury my face in her neck. I know she's talking about my dire need to be in contact with her, and the fact that I clearly don't share the same sweet dreams, but I've had enough drama for tonight without having to relive my nightmares just to explain myself.

"Nah, I've just got it bad, I think." I surmise. Her hand starts to stroke up and down my back. "You climb in my window, every night. Just to fall asleep with me. You think?" She replies lazily, smugly. "Who says that's all I'm here for?" I say saucily, and before she can respond I lunge forward and capture her lips. She makes a sound of protest so I put my thumb on her chin and give a little tug. When her mouth opens and I slip in my tongue, all resistance fades. Satisfied with my point, I start to pull away but she quickly catches me and reattaches our lips, hands locking behind my head.  
The desperate action makes my blood sing. 'She has what you need, Jade. This is how to get it, Jade.' With her lips on mine, her hands in my hair, mine dancing at the edge of her thin shirt. I slowly creep them up her toned stomach and she doesn't stop me, though her kiss becomes more languid. Even when my fingertips graze the bottom of her breast, she just gasps and dives in for more. I cover it and she breathes in sharply between us. I rest my forehead on her while my other hand does it too, eliciting a similar reaction.

"Yeah?" Is about I'll I can manage with my cave man brain. "Yeah." She answers, smiling and nodding eagerly before meeting me for another kiss. I squeeze her with one hand and start to tease a hardening tip with the other. She squirms under me and releases small noises of satisfaction into my mouth. As hot as they are, they remind me how new she is to all this. I pull back and breath heavily into her neck. "Do you wanna..you wanna stop, right?" I rasp. She bites her lip while she thinks, and god shes not gonna make this easy on me.

Instead of answering she tugs one of my hands out her shirt and places it at the top of her shorts. My eyebrows dig down in concern. "Are you sure? We don't have to do anything." She shakes her head and smiles up at me. "I know. But I trust you, Jade. I'm ready." She says surely, but I still have my doubts. "Are you sure?" I ask again, feigning seriousness for her sake. Im dying to touch her but I need to know this is really what she wants.

"Yes. And at this point it'd be cruel to just leave me like this." I raise an eyebrow and she bites her lip nervously. The look of pure arousal I shoot back erases her inhibitions, and I follow her eyes to my hand. She slides it further down. "You make me so..." She closes her eyes and puts both her hands on top of my own between her. She presses my hand into her and arches into it. " _wet_." She whispers shyly, eyes opening again to gauge my reaction.

I'm dumbstruck. Watching her use my hand to...feeling her...this is the hottest fucking thing. I press into her and she lets out a surprised high pitch moan. I quickly cover her mouth. I look at the door and then back at Tori. Shes looking up at me with clouded eyes, and presses me into her again, groaning into my hand. A few more and I can feel her arousal through her shorts.

"Are you ready?" I ask. I feel calmer, more in control now that I've been touching her. This is about her, and my focus is on nothing else. This is her first time and I'm responsible for her, for making this a loving, satisfying, non-traumatizing experience. I'm going to take care of her. I move my hand so she can answer.

"Y-yes." She gasps, still riding my hand. I tug her shorts down her legs and spare a quick look when she whines at the loss of my hand before disposing of them over the side of the bed. I crawl back over her and rest my elbows on either side of her ribs to support myself, torso hovering between her legs.  
Shes looking up at the ceiling, and she looks so scared. I collapse against her. My chin rests just above the bellybutton my hands have just exposed to me. When they, and her shirt in them, reach her breasts she all but rips the garment off, albeit awkwardly and with a little wiggling. I laugh warmly and hope that she gets the hint. This is supposed to be fun, we can be goofy right now. Shes always goofy. I like goofy.

While she gets free I reach past her for her pear doc, quickly cycling through the hundreds of songs shes downloaded. I see one I recognize and know has a slow beat. Unfortunately it could also be classified as rock so Toris smirks at me and says "You would pick something like this." I smile and quickly defend. "What? Its slow...ish..." And she shakes her head and takes mine in her hands, tells me "Its perfect."

I am responsible for her. I kiss her soundly, firmly. I bow my head into her neck and suck lightly on her pulse point while tease I her breasts for few a moments. I leave a trail of little love bites all the way down her middle and stop when I reach her naval. Then, I drag my hand up the back of her thigh and cup behind her knee. I situate my self between her legs and lift one up. I press a gentle kiss to her knee, locking eyes with her as I continue kissing in an ascent to the height of her thighs. When I reach it I lay my tongue flat against her already damp panties and flex the muscle, feeling her squirm responsively.

She smells...good. Really good. Good enough to... "Jade." She gasps, beseeching. Taste. I move her underwear aside and drag my tongue along her slit. Positively delicious. But her grip on my hair is bordering on painful and I worry for her again. Its funny, usually I'm the one she has to calm down. Then again were usually just making out, if I had her between my legs...she'd be missing a few locks.

I crawl back up her body and she gives me a confused look. "I want to touch you, and be with you when I do, I just wanted to..." I actually blush. A little. Barely. "Oh." She says, cheeks coloring a little too. "How do I...?" She asks, not looking me in the eye. I smile. "Better than burgers." She laughs and then studies my face. "You're serious?" She asks incredulously. "What? You just made the top of the list baby, you should be honored." My sarcasm doesn't appear that well in whispers, and it comes out sounding quite sincere. She watches me suspiciously for a few more seconds, until a giggle fights its way past my lips. Then shes rolling her eyes and laughing too.

My hand slides up and down her leg for a moment while I smile up at her. "Are you ready?" I ask again, hand coming dangerously close to the top of her thighs. She nods. "Really? You don't need another warm up?" I half joke. She smiles softly and shakes her head, before a more serious look captures her features. "But, can you...cover my mouth again? My parents..." She whispers.

"I'm aware." I whisper back, palm sheathing delicate lips. With one hand over her mouth and the other reaching to touch her, my body presses heavily into her, and I place my head in the crook of her neck to divert some of the weight. I position one finger at her entrance and her legs open around me. Shes already so wet, a few brushes of my thumb against her clit has her hips struggling to raise under my weight. I kiss her neck and seek out that spot that always distracts her. I want this to feel good.

I slowly push inside her and she grunts under my hand. I slide it over to her forehead and trace her hairline. "Just say the word." I whisper. I push it all the way in and shes so tight, gripping the digit in her constricting walls. I move it in and out of her, gaining speed the wetter she gets. The more she receives the noisier she gets, and soon I'm covering her mouth again, laying on her while her fingers tightly grip my shoulders with every entry.

Shes squeezing almost constantly now and mumbling things into my palm. I want to hear them. I slide my hand to her jaw and turn her lips to my ear. Her nose presses into hair and her legs bunch up around my hips, squeezing in time with the rocking her own. "Fuck, Jade." She whispers, or whines really. She wraps her arms around me and squeezes me closer, anchoring her lips on my shoulder. "Fuck, Jade, fuck." I twist my finger and hit that spot. "Jade I...I..."


	13. Chapter 13

Jades POV  
She loves me.

 _Congratulations_.

Oh God, you again.

 _Whats wrong? You should be happy. You've done it, deus tenibre. There's nothing more powerful than the chasity of a young maiden, let alone one who's so in love with you. Well done, child. Well done._

I am done. She loves me, and I'm whole. Just like that. Every memory I tried so hard to grasp, returned to me. Every emotion I couldn't place, suddenly given a name. All that raw potential...utilized.

Toris POV  
Oh god, I'm so close. We've made love a million times in my head but I had no idea it would feel this _good_. And she so sweet. In my dreams shes always been...well, rough. But now, shes being so careful with me. Gently exploring me with her calm, experienced attitude. Before I asked for this, she was how I expected. Feverish and giddy, cause I'm new to her. But I'm new to this, and knowing that she took on this nonchalant demeanor, like she wasn't just out of breath from touching me a moment ago. All calm and suave while I panic beneath her.

And frig if it didn't work. I was always ready for her, but she had me ready and relaxed.

"Jade...I..." she lifts her head from my neck and looks down at me with that little half smile, and its more than I can take. "I...I love you." The words sputter past my lips before I can stop them, before I can _think_. Her fingers still inside me but its too late. I feel myself tighten around them and ride them till everything fades away.

And now...I'm too scared to open my eyes. I feel her slim fingers touchdown on my cheek, so gently I have to open my eyes to make sure its really her. Her face is inches away, and there's a clarity in her eyes. She kisses me hard, and it softens until she pulls back, a breath away again. "Te quoque amo...Victoria." She whispers reverently. She takes my bottom lip into her warm mouth and nibbles on it softly, tenderly, making my breath catch in my throat.

When she retreats, the warm smile on her face forces my own despite my confusion. "Um, what?" She laughs lightly. "God, I've missed you. I've missed you so much. I didn't even realize how much I missed you." Her eyes squint in revelation, and my expression matches hers with opposite causation. Where did I go?

"Miserable, I was. And angry, angry that I was so empty all the time, inexplicably shattered. Unaware and un-whole." She exhales wistfully. "I digress. That, my pet, was a language I insist you relearn." She says simply, propping her head up and watching me.  
"Relearn?" I ask dumbly. She sighs deeply and begins running the delicate fingers of her free hand along my jaw. If her tone and touch wasn't so affectionate, I might be annoyed by their condescending nature. "Ahhh... You cannot contain the memory of so many lifetimes, my little mortal. It is why you were spoon fed through dreams... Wouldn't want to hurt that pretty little head of yours." She says teasingly, tracing my hairline.

"Dreams? So they're...they're real!" I ask excitedly. Jade just nods with a wide smile on her face, clearly amused that the dramatic irony of our relationship suddenly being tipped in her favor. "How do you know?" I ask, sitting on my elbows. She reaches out again, toying with a lock of my hair.  
"Can't you tell?" She asks, making a face and gesturing to her body. I just continue to stare at her, growing less charmed by her nonchalant attitude the more my confusion grows. "Iterum me totum." She says cheekily. "Jade..." I whine and pout deeply. Jade laughs out loud before putting on a playfully apologetic smile and wrapping her arms around my sulking form. "I'm sorry for teasing you, my love. I promise to explain." She placates, and my interest hangs on a word.

"Love?" I ponder shyly, relaxing against the bed and into her embrace. "Love." She responds softly but seriously, before smiling wildly and burying her face in my neck. She leans into me heavily, shoulder brushing my chin as my hands instinctively swim up her exposed back and hold her more securely. I reminded of mere minutes ago, when we were wrapped up just the same, with her lips and fingers all over me. "Is...Did?" I stutter, trying to find a way to phrase my ridiculous question. "Was it the sex?" I blurt.  
She giggles and tickles my neck with her nose. "Yes. When we _made love_ -" she corrects, and my stomach flips, cause I never thought I'd hear Jade West scold me for referring to us together in such a blasé manner. "-I had all of you, even the pieces of me you were given." She sighs again. "In layman's terms," she drops the eloquent speech patter shes recently taken up "I'm a God, baby."


	14. Chapter 14

A/N Sorry this took so long to put out. My phone crashed and I lost everything, so it took me a while to get re-motivated.

...

"A..." I leave her to comprehend what I've just said, biding my time by reacquainting my self with her body. I flick my tongue against the fine, smooth skin of her throat and watch her swallow with a fond fascination. I'm predisposed to spend the rest of the day doing such impulsive things, but unfortunately my companion seems less content to wallow in the moment.

"... _God_." She mutters. Pulling back I think I see a light bulb flicker on above her, but my hallucination quickly morphs into ticking gears. "If you're a god, what does that make me?" She asks hesitantly, like shes afraid of the answer.

I sit up, taking a comfortable place on her hips. I seek out her hands and bring them up to my lips, where I kiss them before responding. "My Victoria." I continue holding her hands up and she gets the hint, taking my face in them. "My paramour..." I say turning my cheeks this way and that in her soft hands, their gentle hold. "My face that sunk a thousand ships, made immortal with a kiss..." The words flutter out against her fingertips as her hands come alive, respondent in my need to feel her.

"Immortal." She gasps, and when my eyes open hers are focused on me intently. Then a jaw breaking smile takes over her face. "So the dreams are real?" I nod, and she pulls me down to kiss her. Softly at first, but then shes pulling me tight against her, kissing me harder each second until we break apart with stuttering gasps. "I love you." She breathes out against my lips. "Who are you?" I smile and taste her again.

"I thought you'd never ask."

...

"Power. That's the one word that could be applied to every aspect of my life. As a child, it shaped me. I had none, and the people around me horded it, abused it, and used it to oppress me. So as I grew and my mind was molded, powerless became synonymous with helplessness. With struggle, with pain." She frowns but I ignore it, theres much more unpleasantness to come.

"My adult life became a quest for the strength and control that eluded me then. I had no time for the distractions of those who attempted to sap my power with their cavalcade of sly means. Obedience, societal roles, acceptance...love. All ploys of varying attractiveness that I never once fell for." Victoria's hand tightens around mine and I shrug. "I was a different person back then."

"Instead, my sights were set on accomplishing feats of darker natures. Ones that most people

were too afraid to even attempt. But fear meant weakness, so I had long ago rid myself of the emotion. Freeing me to grasp powers just waiting to be claimed."

"I spent years learning how useful death could be. What words to whisper over it, what to sacrifice to it, and finally, how to conquer it." Her eyes widen.

"Fully realized, I moved to a village where my defection wasn't known. Instead of kindness my skills lied in secrecy, illusion. Aided by my supernatural abilities I easily avoided detection for many years, manipulating the primitive society to my liking." I state proudly.

"I married, as women in my time were expected, but I made no exception for my husband. I was as apathetic towards courting, lovemaking, childbearing and raising as I was in all the parts of life that didn't fuel my power." Shes frowning again, but I can see an adorable twinge of jealousy in her eyes.

"Until my reign, as all things do, ended." I sigh. "My coldness had betrayed me, and I believe even if I wasn't a witch I'd've been punished." I theorize. "Either way, they cited my carelessness as a mark of the devil and accused me of being a demon. My husband and children, having no love for me, didn't deny the accusations and I was taken by a mob." Tori's clearly upset but she still doesn't interrupt. She just keeps squeezing my hands, trying to heal things that never hurt. This part is always worse on her.

"They dragged me into the forest where the men had been chopping down trees. In the midst of a dozen stumps was one lone tree, which they tied me too. I pleaded and begged, feigning fear and casting as many glamours of innocence as I could produce."

"It didn't matter. The fire lit up quickly, and I wont lie, it hurt." Her hand squeezes mine desperately and she looks away, so I give her a moment before continuing. "Oh, Jade..." She buries her face in my shoulder. "I did lose consciousness, though. Eventually." I recall bitterly. I let out a calming sigh and lay my head against hers.

"A long sleep." She seems to relax too, sensing the worst is over. "I don't know how long it took me to heal, but when I woke up the landscape had changed. In my time it had been lush and green, but now it was tan and thirsty. Even the sky seemed paler." She listens curiously.

"Despite the dryness, certain vegetation still thrived. Over the small bushes that surrounded the me, I spotted the head of a young woman approaching." I say looking down at her, and she smiles.

"A wicked grin captured my features. Finally I'd be able to carryout the desires I had neglected in my life. And who better to sate them than the beautiful girl before me." I whisper in a spooky voice, making her laugh.

" _Come closer_ , I thought." I say, wringing my hands evilly and earning another chuckle. "Heeding my unspoken whim, she stumbled into the brush. Her eyes raked my torn form, not fully healed, and she let out a bloodcurdling scream!" Tori watches with rapt attention, slightly bemused by my overacting.

"A kind soul, she refrained from fleeing lest I need her help." Victoria blushes at the compliment. "She walked towards me hesitantly, hands outstretched in a calming manor. But as soon as she was in reach I lunged for her!" I shake Tori in my arms and she playfully chastises me, ordering me to get on with it.

"The girl quickly turned to run but my grip was strong and she fell. I slithered up her back, soaking her pretty clothes my blood." I say creepily, and she cringes. "I pulled her hair to the side and buried my nose in her neck, inhaling her sweet scent." I do the same to Victoria, her body tense but compliant.

"She let out a terrified whimper." She swallows. "And I felt an unfamiliar twisting in my gut. I lay there for a moment, trying to give this new emotion a name. A tear slid down her cheek, suddenly illuminating the abhorrence the sound had caused in me." I say as I release her and she faces me again.

"Guilt." I look into her eyes, hoping they convey the regret I felt that day. "I...I didn't want to hurt her." She takes my cheek in her hand and nods. "I rolled off you and you quickly stood, ready to escape your attacker. But... You cast a look back at me. And my injuries, combined with my sudden benignity, compelled your sweet soul to help me." I smile fondly at her.

"You took me home with you. You took care of me for months. A complete stranger speaking a foreign language who tried to attack you. Yet everyday you dressed my wounds, fed me, spoke to me." Her eyebrows quirk. "What did I say?"

I smirk. "Well I have no idea mostly, except our names. You taught me yours, repeating 'Vik-Tor-E-Yah' until I got it. But no matter how many times you tried to tech you, you always called me _Yade_." She blushes and looks away for a moment, embarrassed.

"I loved it." I tell her sincerely. "And, sometimes..." I begin to whisper, leaning in close and darting my eyes left and right before locking with hers. "When your father was away... Or dead, dead asleep..." I keep leaning in until our lips are a centimeter apart and I can feel her quick breaths. "You would kiss me." I state, and lean back a bit to see her reaction. Shes blushing again, but she looks kind of proud too.

"It was during quiet moments, when you were tracing my face and watching me with this look of... _adoration_." I recall. "Or after a fit of laughter brought on by the language barrier," I smile. "but it was always sweet and slow. I think you were afraid to hurt me, and I kept it gentle. I

didn't want to hurt you either. Never again." I swear to her.

"I found something in you that couldn't live in myself, so that's where I kept it. You're where I protected it, fed it, _felt_ it. My love."

I kiss her, needy and hot. I rest my forehead on hers and breathe her in again. "Is that why were connected?" She asks. I open my eyes to see that hers are still closed. I sigh and close mine again. "No. That was not enough." She pulls away and stares at me, confusion written all over her face.

"What _happened_?" She asks desperately. "He found out." I smile sadly. "He went for you first, and I was too weak to react fast enough. The blood just... poured out of you." I lament. "My dad?" She asks, horrified.

I shake my head. "You can't blame him. It was another life, another time. Things were different." She nods despite the frown on her face. "I couldn't take it. You were my _everything_. My maiden, my knight, my redemption. I couldn't-" I take in a ragged breath.

"I couldn't just let you go. So I split the bonds of my immortality, dividing it amongst us with a powerful conduit: Sacrifice. As my blood joined yours in a puddle on the floor I wailed an incantation of my own design."

"The infinite years I had stolen became two infinite lives. Bound to each other, we were reborn. But every time we met you had no recollection of our past. On more than one occasion my attempts to force the collective memories of all our lives inside your brain was the cause of your death." I look at my lap and swallow the memories. "I quickly learned to stop."

"But, I found that a sliver of my conscious could safely live within you, returned when you learned to love me again. Only, spells require a more...literal interpretation, as love is rather abject and not easily defined. So I figured, if you loved me enough to _love_ me, you'd be ready."

She blushes and rolls her eyes. "Okay, I guess that makes sense. So you didn't remember me because your...consciousness?" I nod. "Was in my head?" I nod again, and smile at the look of understanding she has. "So, how many times have you had to explain this to me?" She asks.

I sigh and lay back on the bed. "Too many times..." I say wistfully, motioning for her to follow. She complies and hovers above me, pink lips fixed into a pout. "Whats wrong?" I ask, reaching out and tangling my hands in her soft hair.

"Its kinda not fair." I look at her curiously and she huffs. "You get to remember everything now! You can speak Latin and play piano! What do I get?" I laugh and bring her down to me. "You, my little mortal, can earn the love of a _God_." I brush my lips against hers sensually, and when I pull away her eyes have closed.


End file.
